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Friar Stories: Journeys to Franciscan Life

Fr. Mathew Conlin, OFM

Father Matthew T. Conlin, OFM, a native of Barker in Western New York, was appointed Pastor of St. Paul's Church, Wilmington, Del., in March 1991. He had served as President of Siena College, Loudonville, N.Y., from 1970-76; Director of Anthony House, Jersey City, N.J., from 1979-82; and Provincial Vicar of Holy Name Province,1982-87.

My life as a friar began just 50 years ago. I had already decided to be a priest, a diocesan priest. But I decided further that being a Franciscan might be more to my liking. It had something to do with opportunity and diversity. The life of a diocesan priest offered little diversity; options for the friars seemed limitless.

After thinking all that through, I was ordained in 1945 and spent the next 34 years in higher education. Thirty-one of them at Siena College and three at a University in Puerto Rico. Was this "diversity"? Had that "diversity of opportunity" been a mirage? I decided to take a closer look at Franciscan life.

For three years I worked for your favorite association, St. Anthony's Guild, along with Fr. Salvator Fink. Together we founded the five Anthony Houses, mostly residences for the needy which you members still support. My home base was the Anthony House in Jersey City. That was the middle '80s, and those years gave me my most meaningful ministry. It is hard to articulate the specific challenge which made those years fulfilling, but I can give you a good idea with this story.

Our night watchman in Jersey City was Willard Scott, a faithful and philosophic black man. At night when I couldn't sleep, I'd go down to the front door and chat with him, always learning something new. One night I said: "You know, Willard, the group of kids (we always had at least 20) staying in the house this week is probably the best we ever had."

He made no answer for a long time. And then he said: "That may be. But in 10 years, one third will be in jail; one third will be prostitutes, and one third will be dead." That was just 10 years ago. In the quiet of the front office his words came to me as the greatest challenge I had ever been given. I believed what he had just said, but I wanted to help make it not happen. Did those of us who were "working at it" ever succeed? We will never know.

Then came my five-year term as Provincial Vicar. Still not enough diversity after all those years of sameness. So I settled into the routine of parish life in Rochelle Park and Wood-Ridge, N.J., and completed a graduate program in pastoral counseling. I was getting older. Counseling offered the opportunity of a ministry I could do sitting down. It had great appeal. But I was asked to join the staff of our retreat house at Rye Beach, N.H., a breathtakingly beautiful spot along the ocean. I
was nine months into the life of the place when, in the usual way of a ripe and ready fetus, I was
delivered. An emergency had arisen in Wilmington, Del., and a friendly bishop was in need of a
pastor for the one and only Black and Hispanic parish in his diocese.

Once released from the bonds of my early 34-year commitment, I had learned that I really enjoyed
diversity. But, to be more precise, it was cultural diversity that I liked best. It began around '82 when I noticed those beautiful Koreans around our St. Francis friary in New York where I was living
then.

I offered one hour once a week to a group of young Korean adults. About 15 showed up and soon it was two hours once a week and then four hours twice a week, etc. Being with them (I could never say "working with them") was one of the great joys of my Franciscan years.

I found a different brand of cultural diversity in the Anthony Pauses. Here in Wilmington, with the Blacks and Hispanics, I have found still another kind. The great beauty of God's awesome variety of culture and race continues to attract me.

So I finally found the diversity I longed for. And I really didn't have to look far.

—This essay was written in 1992 when Fr. Matthew was pastor of St. Paul's Church, Wilmington, Del. It appeared in the May 1992 issue of The Anthonian magazine.